Coping with the new diagnosis of a pelvic health condition can be embarrassing. This is an emotion I have continued to process even though I have been advocating for pelvic health and sharing my story for a number of years. I experienced fear when I began sharing my story and recall actually worrying about what people would think of me if they knew…as if I had somehow done something wrong now that I had a pelvic health condition. Even though my rational mind reminded me that my condition was related to childbirth and ultimately a lack of knowledge in terms of how I could have prevented the condition I still felt what I would describe as shame.
What a loaded word…shame.
Dr. David R. Hawkins explains our emotional state as intrinsically linked with our energy; what he describes as levels of consciousness. In my coaching work with women who live with chronic discomfort and pain we explore the potential of feeling optimum energy. This is often a process of remembering a time in our lives when we felt love, joy, and bliss. Dr. Hawkins uses a numerical scale to further communicate that a person experiencing these feelings resonates with energy between the numeric values of 500 – 600 whereas a person experiencing shame would resonate at the lowest energy level of 20.
New mothers experiencing feelings of shame connected to their pelvic health experience live their life in misery. They can feel humiliated as well as experience despair and regret often behind closed doors disempowered to share these feelings even with those closest to them.
With everything we know about how important it is for a mother to have the energy to provide for her baby it is critical that pelvic health be viewed within a new context, one that is connected with empowerment and with opportunities to connect with a woman’s authentic strength and ability to heal.
Author and holistic health care provider Tami Lynn Kent states, “Though the women I see for pelvic care have modern beliefs about their roles in contemporary modern society and feel themselves to be empowered, inwardly their bodies register discomfort with many aspects of their femininity. This is the result of feminine wounding and restrictive female identities.”
This speaks to me as I have come to the realization that I believed I was not perfect anymore, I was somehow flawed and this reached into the core of my feminine identity. Also, that many women still feel disempowered in the birthing process.
Once you understand this flaw in your reasoning, you can begin the process of reclaiming your feminine view of yourself. You will no longer need to look to external images as reference points to define yourself. You will be able to look within yourself.